It all started with the wiener wrap...

It was wiener wrap day in the cafeteria today. They are SO good. They make their own rolls to wrap with that are delicious. I was perhaps too excited when I heard the announcement this morning. So I haven't been exactly good; but not too bad either. I did get to work out and I bought a smaller size of jeans. Hoping to finish the week mostly on track so I will have to make the most of tomorrow and Saturday (our painting party day!).

Ummm...

I ate today. I ate a lot today. None of it was worth it. I don't really want to talk about it.

Routine

Not much to report today, which I consider good, while maybe being uninteresting. I feel like I have gotten back into a routine, which I need. Now if only I could get Jared on a sleep routine which could translate into an exercise routine for me...

Monday, Monday, Can't Trust that Day

I knew the scale would tell me a different story this morning. But I am not going to let that set me back. I had a good eating day today. That makes 3 in a row. Hopefully that means I am getting back on track. If only I could figure out the workout thing. If anyone has any suggestions I am open. The problem is not so much what to do but when to do it.

Third Times the Charm

It took 3 times on the scale this morning to believe what I was seeing. I was totally prepared to see a gain after the on again off again week I had. I was not prepared to see a LOSS of over 6 pounds. I was sure the scale was wrong so I stepped off to try again. Exact same number. I still was unsure. So after I had showered and was still wet, I tried again. The exact same number appeared. I'm still thinking it might have been a fluke and am expecting to see a higher number in the morning. But today is my Weight Watchers weigh day and today's weight is the one that I record so as of today, I have lost 49.2 pounds. This is the motivation I needed to continue.

Worked it out

A busy Saturday around here. I was a little worried about how I would do being at home. Home it where I tend to eat everything I see. But since I was so busy I didn't have time to let myself eat. I did not go over on points today and actually earned a couple from working out. Yes. I said it I got in a workout today: 30 mins on the eliptical. I didn't do two but I would count scrubbing the floor by hand as at least half of one (althoug Mitch didn't see it happen so he doesn't believe I did it). An overall good day. I weigh in tomorrow: not looking forward to that.

Frustrations

Frustration #1: Jared finally sleeps through the night so getting up at 4:30 to workout would not have been so unbearable. When my alarm goes off at 4:30, I feel like I have been run over by a truck. Still feeling not as well as I would like, so no workout today.

Frustration #2: I am an emotional eater. Today has been a very emotional day. There were 4 cookies left after I gave them to my class at the end of the day. Having already eaten two (I counted the points) I really didn't need to eat more. But I wanted them. Walking out to the car I kept thinking how I was going to drive all the way home to Pendleton with the cookies in the car without caving. Then as I was opening the trunk to put the games in, it only made perfect sense to put the cookies in as well. And then Megan took care of them for me when I got home.

So even with those frustrations I am calling today a success. I have counted everything I have eaten, I have gone over a couple of points, but I am allowed that with Weight Watchers, and now that the day is over I am not going to eat anymore (I tend to be a night eater as well).

I am going to workout tomorrow even if I do feel like I got run over by a truck because Saturday is a good day to get in a workout. Maybe I could even do two.

Baby Steps

I am calling today a mild success. I was relatively good, not perfect (I had to test the cookie dough). Baby steps, right? I also didn't get a workout in; my night was pretty full. I am going to set the alarm and try to get up at 4:30, sleep is overrated anyway. Thank you for your encouragement. Knowing I had to check in with you kept me from buying that piece of cake at the store and eating on the way to pick up Tucker. Baby steps.

Weight-ing for Change

I looked down and saw "it." That nasty stomach pooch that makes me look pregnant now and if left alone will eventually make me look like a pear. I had been doing so well. 45 pounds down in 6 months time, actually in 5 months time. And then life happened and I went back to work and can't find time to work out where it isn't taken my time from someone or something else. And then the holidays came: nuff said. But I was going to be good back at the first of the year and then I went back to work and would come home and eat until I made dinner and then I would eat dinner and then I would eat some more. No, I don't know why and if I knew why I probably wouldn't do it.

But seeing "it" today has gotten me really depressed (which of course makes me eat). I don't want to be "that" mom; I want to be "hot" mom. No, not so hot that my son's friends like me, but hot so I don't feel out of place next to all of the other hot moms.

So I am totally stealing my sister's idea: she is my inspiration for this whole thing after all. I am going to be accountable, even if it is to unknown strangers online. I am using Weight Watchers: I will track everyday, every bite, and be responsible for what I eat. I will make time to exercise, even if it is 4:30 in the morning or 10 o'clock at night.

I have NEVER failed at anything: 4.0 in high school; a Master's in Education; excelling at my job; raising 3 sons. I am bigger than my desire to eat and I will win. I have to make change happen.

The goal is to be at 145lbs by my birthday, June 8. I am 45 lbs away. I will need your help and encouragement to keep going. I am not going to wait until Sunday like I always say. Today is shot, but tomorrow is a new day. I am going to make the change.